ENTITLEMENT MINDSET (Part 1)

DAMN! "I SHOULD HAVE IT"

I want to take you through memory lane, to bring to your remembrance those habits you exhibited as a kid, but probably did not take to heart.

Months ago, my little cousins visited me. They decided to spend a few days with my immediate family since they were on holiday. During their stay, I observed an attitude exhibited by the youngest among the three of them which incited my concern.

Steph had the habit of always requesting for her share of whatever was given to her older siblings. She would always stretch out her hands and say "give me my own," and she would cry out loud and throw tantrums if she was not given.

Do you remember those times when you used to say "give me my own?” Do you know that it is this habit that has grown to become the "I am supposed to have it" personality trait? This trait is characterized by the entitlement mindset.

According to Conservapedia, an entitlement mentality is a state of mind in which an individual comes to believe that privileges are instead rights, and they are expected as a matter of course.

Simply put, when you see privileges as rights that must be granted to you, you have the entitlement mentality. This state of mind is further expressed in the form of actions which, when repeated becomes a habit and eventually a part of your personality.

The sense of entitlement oft times arises due to feelings of mistreatment or inability to get the necessities that other people have. Likewise, this mindset can be formed when an individual who has suffered from low self-esteem begins to build confidence. Diane Barth calls this an unhealthy shift towards self-respect. She furthermore stated that while learning to be confident, there is a need to strike a balance between self-respect and respect for others.

Psychoanalyst John Gedo points out that like some other aspects of human nature; the entitlement mindset is a combination of environmental and biological makeup. He went on to assert that humans are programmed to be entitled at the early stage of life, nevertheless, we have also been programmed to gradually develop the ability to be cognizant about other people's needs as well.

It is passable to reason that as a citizen of a country, getting clean water, security, guaranteed job, etc. is your right and ought to be made available by the government or you may presume that it is your right for your parents to provide you with shelter, food, clothes, and education; since they birthed you.

Even so, some supposed rights are yet privileges - I term them "privileged rights". This is because, although they may be your rights, but then, access to them is a privilege, as there are many others born in the same countries and families who are yet incapable of gaining entree to those same things.

In all, even your existence on earth today is a privilege and not a right; a million eggs struggled to get to the sperm.

According to James Michael Lafferty, once you perceive privileges as rights and as such get angry when you do not have them, you are lost. If you refuse to believe that life is a battle and you desire the material things which you presume that you deserve to be freely given to you by others, then, life becomes nothing more than a vicious cycle for you. Getting everything you want from others does not bring lasting joy, rather, a true sense of fulfillment comes from those achievements that took great effort to acquire.

Meditate on the following statistics - 5 facts you probably are not aware of:

• 10.7 percent of the world's population goes hungry every day. This means that if you can eat and be satisfied, you are part of the top 89 percent.

• One-third of the world lacks access to clean water and hygienic environmental conditions. So if you can turn on your water and use it without fear of being infected with a disease, you have scaled up to the top 67 percent.

• 60 percent of the world has no internet access. Hence, you are among the top 40 percent in the world if you have a smartphone or PC that connects to the world wide web.

• Over 93 percent of the world doesn't get the opportunity for a college education. Thus, your diploma or bachelor's degree accounts for you to be among the top 7 percent of the world.

• In Nigeria, there are 100 million estimated cases of malaria with over 300, 000 deaths per year. This means that if you suffered a malaria attack during the year, you are among the 99.7 who won against it.

👉   What are your thoughts about the statistics above and what can you learn from them?

👉   Discuss the statistics with your friends to hear their opinion.

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